BALANCE and the childbearing year

For some reason, I've been thinking a lot about balance this week.

I've been thinking back to when I was living in New York City, 21 years old, fresh out of college. There were many ups and many downs. At some point, I became attached to the concept of balance. It was a totally new concept at that point in my life. I remember thinking that if I could weigh out a)my work (responsibilities), b)my social life (friends, family) and c)my passion (theater and music) then I could feel balanced and thus avoid slipping into periods of depression and self-doubt. At some point, I added d) physical exercise and later that branch evolved into d)physical/spiritual practice. And later, a and c became one. And then they merged with d.

As I got older, I got better and better at maintaining balance in my life. My husband Ted and I always talk abut how challenging our twenties were because we were trying to figure out who we were; we love being in our thirties because we now know who we are and feel secure in that ( not to say that I don't slip up every once in a while...get out of balance... and swing down). As I look at my friends and family, I see how some people figure out how to maintain balance easier than others. Some people have a lot of help from their families and some don't. Some seek help through prayer while others seek help in therapy. Others never get on track and turn to drugs and alchohol. I guess this is the journey.

So when you're pregnant and you are carrying a baby, the balance is thrown off. How could it not be? This shift of balance reflects itself in your physical, mental and spiritual body. I always hear you mention how your priorities shift during your pregnancy. It may take some of you a while to figure out how to maintain balance while carrying this baby inside of you. Getting to yoga twice or three times a week becomes very important. Certain acquaintences just don't cut it any more and fade out of your life while others shift to the forefront. This is such a perfect time to explore yoga, meditation, bodywork, religion and prayer. And don't forget to reevaluate the whole work scenario because that has to shift too. The great thing is that this journey through your pregnancy and these new skills for balance will really help you through labor, child birth and the up-coming, on-going experience of parenthood.

Because when your baby enters this world---all sense of balance will be gone for a while. Your baby is so defenseless and dependant on you that your equilibrium will fly out the window and that's okay. Your focus will be on your baby's health, happiness and sense of balance: a)eat, b)sleep, c)poop.

But at some point, your baby will become more independant and you can come up for air. He/she will sleep more than three hours at a time and you can start showering and getting dressed every day (wahoo!). At that point, you can start working on finding your balance again. Please don't forget to do this. Happy, balanced parents tend to have happy, balanced children. I remember Juliette saying in a Baby and Me class how important it is for your children to watch you taking care of yourself. So go to yoga or try practcing at home. Sit and mediatate for a few minutes. Get a massage. Get a baby sitter and have a date night!!! But, try not to get lost and out of balance. The whole balance equasion is going to look and smell and taste different then before, now that you have this bundle of joy (and responsibilities) to integrate into the mix.

"Remember, the journey is not about the destination; it is about enjoying the trip."
Alan Finger